Monday, October 18, 2004

I should probably get used to people obsessing about my life, even if it is semi-"private". My mom has already brought it to my attention that people watch me while I am in Tana's. They pay attention to what I say, what I do, what I drink, what I eat, etc... It's flattering, yet unnerving at the same time.

It's part of the cons of being an actor [as your career develops], I know. I'm prepared for anything. I don't want to sound conceited, but if I land something [which I've been told is going to happen soon... *rolls eyes*], then it'll start being like that.

I just want to work on a show, make friends with others who love the same thing that I do... I just want to act, and I don't want to have to be a waitress for the rest of my life. Yes, I've made mistakes, I'm human after all, but I own up to to them. I no longer do some of the things I used to, I've grown up, and grown out of those immature phases in my life. I just wish that I could make people see truth about things that they know nothing about. You don't have to believe me, people can believe all the lies that they want. I know what is true, and if people with lower self-esteem than me, want to try and bring me down in order to feel better about themselves, as some twisted form of therapy, fine. So be it.

It doesn't change what is true. It doesn't change what I will become, or what I do with my life. Most importantly, it doesn't change who I am. I will always be me, I will always stay Ashley. No one can take away my integrity, pride, love, dreams, etc... All of the things I hold inside will always be a part of me, and those around me can take it or leave it. Those who believe all that they hear, and make it a part of their life are those that I don't want to be around anyway. So it's absolutely no sweat off of my back.

If someone wants to be a coward and continue to say things about me when they are supposedly "done with" the situation, fine. It's their conscience that they have to live with for the rest of their life.

I'm going to make it. I'm not going to let anyone bring me down.

So ask yourself, what have you done today to acheieve your goals, reach your dreams? What have you done today to get one step closer? I do something every day, do you?


Ashley scribbled at 2:23 PM

about me

name: Ashley McCarthy
occupation: actress, dancer, painter, sister, amateur photographer, daughter, html goddess, dreamer, poet, lover
born: Sept. 11 1986
astroligical sign: Virgo



I love my art; acting, and I've been doing it all of my life. Big Kit-Kats and Nestle Crunch bars are heavenly, I love to sip those white russians and cosmos, and I'm a very loyal friend. I honestly believe that hammocks and pajama pants are some of man's best inventions, and that Feng Shui really works. I also believe that Dave Matthews is a musical genious, and that Ben Harper is the reincarnation of Bob Marley, with Jack Johnson as his caucasian counterpart. I think that everyone should read at least one of the current Dalai Lama's books. I have the tendency to be slightly flaky sometimes, but I try really hard not to be. I swear. I like meeting new people. I love the beach at any time. When it's raining in April, when it's 2 o'clock in the morning in August during the persaides, whatever. It's seriously always the best place to be. I like a nice balance in life. I can get wild and crazy. Let loose and have fun no matter what. Live it up. Yet I'm also totally mellow. I can have a roaring firepit going, eat an A's breakfast burrito, and hang on the beach playing gin rummy and backgammon all day [and night] and be the happiest person alive. I also love to sleep. Sleep is my friend. <3

all around me:
email me
my Guestbook
my MySpace
my other journal at Melodramatic.com


tagboard chatterbox
people around:
My mom



other peaceful days:
October 2004
July 2005



credits:
host



visitors: